Recently, I shared my “Pages Around the World” travel plans with you. I talked about taking time at the end of the year to reset, reflect, and see life from a wider lens.

Today, I want to slow down and sit with the first leg of that journey: Miami, Key West, and Bimini, Bahamas. It was more than a vacation. It became a living continuation of a story I started in my memoir, Oakland Hills, Milwaukee Rivers.

If you want a quick visual glimpse, I recorded a short intro on my way onto the ship. You can watch it here:
YouTube short: https://youtube.com/shorts/8OdiR_mGWYY?feature=share

Fried Bologna, L-Shaped Apartments, and Full-Circle Moments

In Oakland Hills, Milwaukee Rivers, I wrote about visiting my dad in California. I described the L-shaped apartment building, my cousins who were always nearby, and fried bologna sandwiches that became part of our rhythm.

Those scenes were more than nostalgia. They were snapshots of a boy trying to make sense of family, distance, and identity. They were moments when simple food held together complicated realities.

Fast forward to this trip.

The same cousins I wrote about in that book are the ones I just traveled with on this cruise, over 30 years later. We laughed, we told stories, and we tried to make decades of life fit into a few days of conversation. It felt nostalgic. It also felt sacred.

Those fried bologna memories came alive again. Not as a story from the past, but as proof that we survived things that could have broken us.

Struggle, Success, and the Quiet Work of Perspective

Beyond the fun, something deeper surfaced in our conversations.

We talked honestly about how hard life was for many of us:

  • The instability

  • The financial strain

  • The emotional weight we carried early

  • The complicated family dynamics we did not have language for at the time

We also talked about what those experiences produced:

  • Careers that allow us to provide more stability than we had

  • Intentional choices about how we show up for our children, students, and communities

  • A determination to break cycles instead of repeating them

It reminded me of something at the heart of Oakland Hills, Milwaukee Rivers:
Our lived experiences can mature us if we let them. Struggle can become instruction. Pain can become perspective.

Not because what happened was good, but because we choose to learn from it instead of being defined by it.

Why This Matters in Our Professional Lives

You might wonder what fried bologna, cousins, and a cruise have to do with leadership or professional growth.

The connection is simple. We carry our whole story into every room we enter.

In higher education, leadership spaces, and every professional context I move through, I see the same pattern. People are leading teams, supporting students, guiding organizations, and making complex decisions while still holding parts of their own story that were never fully named or processed.

Here is what this trip reaffirmed for me:

  1. Your origin story still speaks.
    The places you grew up, the meals that sustained you, and the people who shaped you all influence how you show up today. When you acknowledge that, you lead with more honesty and compassion.

  2. Struggle can sharpen, not just scar.
    The goal is not to glorify hardship. It is to recognize that surviving certain seasons often gives you a deeper empathy, a stronger work ethic, and a different kind of problem-solving. Those can be powerful assets in leadership.

  3. Perspective is a leadership skill.
    When you zoom out, you begin to see your life as a connected story instead of a set of disconnected events. That same skill helps you see teams, systems, and students with more clarity and less judgment.

  4. Restoration can look different than you imagined.
    Sitting with cousins I had not shared space with in over 30 years reminded me that restoration is not always dramatic. Sometimes it looks like laughter over dinner, shared memories, and the quiet relief of knowing that everyone is still here and still trying.

A Personal Invitation

As you close this year and look toward the next, I want to invite you to pause and reflect on your own “fried bologna sandwich” story.

The small, simple memories from your early life that still shape:

  • How you view struggle

  • How you lead

  • How you extend grace to others

Ask yourself:

  • What did my early experiences teach me about resilience, responsibility, or care?

  • How are those lessons influencing the way I lead or support others today?

  • Where am I seeing evidence that my struggle created better opportunities for those coming after me?

If you saw yourself in any part of this reflection and you have not yet read my memoir, I would love for you to journey through the full story with me.

📖 Signed hardcover copies of Oakland Hills, Milwaukee Rivers: A Memoir of Survival, Identity, and Purpose are available here:
https://www.drkeyspeaks.com/store

As I continue my Pages Around the World journey in the weeks ahead, I will keep sharing reflections from different parts of the globe, often with one of my books in hand. My hope is that somewhere in these stories, you feel seen, encouraged, and reminded that your own story still has chapters left to write.

If this resonated with you, I would love to hear in the comments:

👉 What is one lesson from your early life that still shapes you as a leader today?

Be encouraged.